3 Years Blogging and Here’s What I’ve Learned

I’ve been blogging for a bit over 3 years now and I have to say- it has been a TON of work! Not all work though. There’s been plenty of play and lots of wonderful lessons learned that I gained more from than lost. For those of you who may be just starting out- I know that it can seem very overwhelming, so in hopes that you can circumvent a few- here is the short list of major obstacles I encountered and/or have overcome throughout these past few years.



 1. You don’t have to have expensive equipment to create great content.

This was important for me to learn and it took me over a year to realize this, because of a background in professional photography. The truth is that we create more fun, spontaneous content sometimes when our guard is down- when we haven’t prepped and dolled up for hours to prepare for one photo shoot. Capturing a great moment doesn’t always require a pre-meditated shoot location and a spendy DSLR. Sometimes the best images come from your phone when you come across a fun treat, stunning backdrop or great lighting.

This realization was particularly important for me, because I am such a perfectionist and over-achiever. It allows me room to breathe and get my creative juices flowing to ease up on the pressure of content creation.

I have gone back and forth on preferred equipment- opting for convenience more-so when I’m traveling versus better tech when I’m stationed at home.

PS If you’d like me to do a post on the equipment I actually use, please leave me your feedback and ideas in the comments below.

2. It’s TRUE: Lighting is Everything.

One aspect that remains Queen is yes, light is truly everything.. This is actually a learned skill that I carried over from photography. I adore good light and spend about 1/3 of my time in Los Angeles in order to take better care of both my mental health and my creative pursuits as a creator.

Besides, good light is THE ultimate filter, because it will soften and wash out blemishes that most people don’t see in real life- but that your high def camera (and even some phones) will capture much to your chagrin. An eye for Good Lighting is something to spend a good portion of your time on and will only benefit you as your equipment, surroundings and opportunities grow and change.

3. Your Blogger Community is Imperative to Growth.

Now, you may see or hear of the occasional blogger who has clawed her way to the top and somehow “made it big”. That is not this story. (And to be honest, what a sad one that is.) In my experience- across most fields, women who support women are the one’s who will achieve true success. This may not always come easy due to a lot of different insecurities- maybe you’re an introvert, you struggle with social anxiety, jealousy or ego- but the KEY is to fight through those insecurities toward a bigger picture- success through community.

I actually ran into a blogger last year who had recently relocated to Portland. And in my usual fashion, I put my feelers out there to see if we would connect and potentially become blogger allies, maybe even friends. Now don’t get me wrong- I am a small circle kind of woman and a very freaking busy momma– what with a full time job, an 8 year old kiddo and a crazy pup- but this out-of-town blogger’s response still managed to shock me. She blatantly spelled it out for me that she was definitely not looking to make new friends, because that was not immediately beneficial to her blog. She was there to network and take advantage of each brand or potential client relationship she came across. Other bloggers? Ha! She could manage fine without a single one.

Okay okay… so she didn’t say that last part. But that was her very forceful, very clear vibe. And needless to say I steered clear of her “she-shall-not-be-named” energy from then on.

All of that to say- the women I have seen ACTUALLY grow, actually achieve success that included personal satisfaction and yes monetary success as well- well, those women are out there prepping, building and growing alongside other women. They are giving a nod to fellow boss babes in one way or another.  And at the end of the day, nobody want’s to arrive at the top alone, right?

I hope these were meaningful and helpful insights on your road toward success. I am learning and growing myself each day, truly. So I don’t ever pretend to be a master of this field… I feel grateful and humbled to gain knowledge and insight through my interactions with my readers and followers every day, as well as my fellow bloggers throughout this journey.

My hope is that you will too.


Photos by the very talented, Rachel Cossette

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  1. Oh man, I agree, lighting is key, and I love my blogger pals! I can’t believe the un-named not so nice blogger acted like that! Shame on her! I’d love to connect sometime! I’m crazy busy, mom of 4, work as an OT, but always love meeting and making new friends!!

    • lavendamemory@gmail.com says:

      Girl that would be amazing! Let’s do a direct message and coordinate. Coffee and/or lunch dates are usually good for me 🙂

  2. I completely agree with you on the first point babe – expensive doesn’t always mean better. Especially if you don’t know how to use it! I’ve made some amazing connections over the years and you’re definitely one of them babe! Loved following your journey and can’t wait to see what this year holds for you!!!

    H xx

    • lavendamemory@gmail.com says:

      You are so kind love! Connecting with other bloggers and growing in pace alongside them makes it feel like we’re all moving in the right direction 🙂 I appreciate your positivity and support! xx

  3. I totally agree that having a great community is an important part of being a blogger! It is great to have people who understand you and your business 🙂

    -xo, Azanique | http://www.lotsofsass.com

  4. Totally agree with all of these!! Love your photos though, your style and quality is always consistent!

    cute & little

  5. Congrats on your 3 year anniversary! I agree with all of the topics you discussed especially the lighting! Your photos are so stunning!

  6. Stephanie says:

    Reading this was so helpful! I’m in my third year of blogging and it’s been such a learning experience. It’s really fascinating to hear what others have learned as well in their trip to the top! Thanks for sharing. Oh – and that’s a super cute outfit!

  7. Girl you look SO adorable in all of these look. I totally agree with your point about lighting. Good lighting is everywhere, and good lighting makes a great photo. What an incredible blogging journey you’ve had!


  8. Yeah, there are definitely some snobby bloggers out there. They exist in my home city and I don’t get why they’re the way they are. I’m sure they didn’t grow from thin air. In other news, I love this outfit. Such a cute way you styled that crop sweater!

  9. sharon wu says:

    i couldn’t agree more to all these points especially the lighting situation! haha congrats on 3 years babe! xo, sharon of http://www.stylelullaby.com

  10. Mary Powers says:

    Love this post!! For 3 years of blogging, you are so successful!! I am coming up on 2 years and feel like its so stagnant right now (as far as Instagram growth) and it’s very frustrating! Any tips for that? I’d love to hear what equipment you use! Couldn’t agree more about connecting with other bloggers. It’s key!

    – Mary

  11. I feel like this post was just what I needed to read today. I realize I need to try harder to grow my blogger community because blogging by yourself can be a little lonely. I would love a post on the equipment you use; your photos are stunning!


  12. These are really great tips! Lighting really is EVERYTHING! And I love your outfit!

  13. I couldn’t agree more with all of this!!!! Especially the section about lighting. So true! Thanks for sharing!

  14. Love this so much! I have a full time job too so it’s nice to hear from someone else who is in a similar position and has done very well for herself. I can’t wait to see what success you achieve in 2018!!



    • lavendamemory@gmail.com says:

      Thanks girl! Yeah, it’s a hustle transferring your eggs into this blogger basket if you don’t have a safety net! I hear you there 🙂

  15. You are such an inspiration! I’m forever obsessed with your photos!



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